With all the drama with the three big fish, it’s been easy in the last few weeks to forget about the three little guys (PUC, Sweettart, and Brain-Einstein) and the ever-patient Milktoast (who is not little).
Our newest reporter checked on them and was horrified to see PUC and Sweettart taking turns walloping Brain-Einstein in the face and side. Brain-Einstein, not to be cowed by any abuse, was dolling out punches between getting whapped. Authorities broke up the fight and put Einstein in prison. They assured us they were being fair in choosing who to incarcerate, as Brain-Einstein has started ten fights with PUC, Sweettart, and Beetlejuice in the last three days. Our faith in the authorities is beginning to wane, particularly in their ability to be fair.
Milktoast was busy eating Madame Geoffrey’s abandoned eggs, distressing Geoffrey. When we went to comfort the would-be mother, she told us that although she knew hatching the eggs was a lost cause after spitting them out to eat, it still hurt to see them being munched on. Milktoast’s mouth was too full to reply, but the smile on her face suggested she could care less about causing distress. There might be some revenge there, too, since Madame Geoffrey often steals Milktoast’s food.
Plopping Brain-Einstein in the slammer causes issues for authorities as Beetlejuice has ramped up his abuse towards Ninja Smee and Madame Geoffrey…again.
“We are tired of putting Beetlejuice in jail,” authorities confided. “Our jail is big enough that all the fish can move around, but still, having him in jail every other week is stressful and we feel guilty.”
To remedy their guilt about the full prison, authorities decided to change tactics. They call it, “Go to your corner.” The strategy is simple when they get tired of seeing Beetlejuice chase and beat up the two ladies; they scream at him to go to his corner. Surprisingly, this works. He does indeed go to the corner he favors and stays there for a short time. Some days the stay is smaller than others, but authorities are pleased that this appears to be working. How long it will work remains to be seen.
—The Bubbly Review
Written In Ink 