Pineapple Upside-down Cake (PUC), previously known as Ivan the Terrible, joined his beloved Sweettart in the watery above and beyond in the great spiritual sea—just two months after her death. He complained about not feeling well and shoved his too-large body into a small hole Brain/Einstein couldn’t fit into. Brain/Einstein patrolled the area with a special kind of vicious vigilance. PUC’s fry, Squirt, tried to comfort his dad, but PUC wanted nothing to do with him and chased him off whenever he got close. The stress of Brian/Einstein’s constant bullying, the death of his wife, and not feeling well was too much for our favorite upside-down eater. RIP PUC 2015-2020.
Little Squirt died tragically during a tank cleaning. He was the last of his family. He survived his mother for a month and a half and his father for three weeks. Little Squirt found a safe home in a hole in Beetlejuice’s cave. Brain/Einstein couldn’t get him, and Beetlejuice didn’t care. Unfortunately, authorities didn’t think to shake the cave violently to toss Little Squirt out of his safe spot when they took the cave out of the tank. He did not survive the hot water used to clean the home. RIP Little Squirt 2020-2020. We are so sorry.
Brain/Einstein is not really dead, but he is dead to us. His thuggish behavior reached a crescendo with PUC and Little Squirt’s deaths. He started to challenge Beetlejuice despite fifty-five gallons of room and despite Beetlejuice being five times bigger than him and able to swallow him whole. Something snapped in the authorities—in all of us, really. Brain/Einstein was gifted to a fish store—which was happy to take the expensive Fairy Cichlid over the phone; however, when they saw that he was fully grown, they complained about his size when the authorities handed them the sandwich bag incarcerating Brain/Einstein. They took him, of course. The fish store complaining about receiving a free Fairy Cichlid that can be sold for $24-$70 put a bad taste in the authorities’ mouths. They will not get fish from them in the future. Those of us at The Bubbly Review think that perhaps the authorities shouldn’t get fish from any store…ever. Good riddance, Brain/Einstein 2015-2020.
We keep thinking that Madame Geoffery’s cancer will be the death of her, if not that, then the ick she keeps contracting, but she’s a strong one and still full of happiness despite the ugly tumor on her dorsal fin.
—The Bubbly Review
Written In Ink 