Last night Pinky and the Brain moved in next to Ivan the Terrible. This morning it appears that the three are cordial neighbors. Authorities have considered gun control and the removal of all weapons of mass destruction. Then they realized that they were just fish, so it should be safe. Shouldn’t it?
Ivan the Terrible asked that he not be addressed with such an injurious title and would like to be known as PUC in the future. Reporters were brave enough to ask the suspected tyrant why he wanted his name changed. His answer shocked all within hearing distance.
“You see that I am the color of pineapple, and I’m sure you’ve noticed that I prefer to eat upside down. I’m also quite fond of fruity cakes. The acronym that describes my defining features, PUC, appeals to me,” he began. “I’m also a fan of the elf sprite, Puck, in Shakespeare’s A Midsummer’s Night Dream. However, I’m not an elf sprite, but a magnificent fish, so to take the name Puck is an absurd idea. PUC gives the illusion of my favorite character in literature while keeping my uniqueness wholly in tack. I insist that I be known as PUC. My application for my name change has been submitted, and I expect its approval immediately.”
With most profound respect, The Bubbly Review will honor Ivan’s request and decision and will refer to him as PUC from now on. We’re concerned about what he’ll do to us if we do not. We will also endeavor not to giggle each time we think about what PUC stands for: Pineapple Upside-down Cake.
–The Bubbly Review
Written In Ink 